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Title: THE MASTER WILLOW SERIES: Master Willow
Author: psimetis
E-mail: psimetis@hotmail.com
Distribution: Near Her Always. Extra Flamey.
Rating: NC-17

* * *


CHAPTER THREE: SINGLE MOM-DOM AND THE PERFECT MATE
(Where We Are Introduced To Lieutenant Harm And Her Howlin’ Harmettes!, Tara’s Choice, And, Willow-Dad)


Tara’s Choice: ‘I Love A Vampire’


When Willow had asked Tara very quietly, how her witch could stand to be with the vampire now that she knew of her sobering past, Tara only had a simple answer.

“I know you as you are now,” she had said, her voice rough and tired from tears. “I see you as more.”

She had seen that promise in her vampire’s aura. Even when Willow had been that beautiful, frightening creature standing on the Bronze catwalk, Tara had Seen her. Willow was special--truly, deeply, something special. Every small thing the young witch had managed so far with her vampire--the promise of friendship, the reconnection to the Life threads of their world--these simple things Tara asked for or did because Willow had such potential in her to Become more.

And yet, even faith in that knowledge could not remove the natural process for a sensitive, caring, young woman to mourn the truly awful deeds her vampire had done.

Willow, the night of the woods, merely held Tara in her bed when they came home. The young woman was grateful that the vampire hadn’t tried seduction to somehow soothe or distract her witch’s sad heart. Willow did try, at least, to maybe clarify what she had done, although with no attempt to excuse her actions. Or even profess to repent. It was honest, and Tara was bittersweetly grateful for that too.

“Did you,” Willow had whispered hesitantly. “See that...two of the three worlds I destroyed were hell on earth realities?”

One reality much like theirs, wiped out by the vampire’s gleeful caprice. Another ruled by demons, destroyed in a fit of vengeance. One already ruined by humanity, annihilated out of a twisted sense of self defense. And when Willow had thought Dru was dust and gone forever, she tried for the death of a fourth world, until a coven of good witches stopped her.

Tara sadly nodded.

“I’m sorry it’s made you sad,” Willow then said, and Tara had raised a hand to her vampire’s cheek, comforting her--which they had both found ironic. By morning, Tara had still not shaken off the weight of what she knew.

“Horsie ranch today, Kitten?” Willow had murmured from the blankets when Tara rose early with the sun. It was Saturday.

“Yes. I-If you don’t mind. Do you?”

“Not at all, baby. Go have fun.”

Willow had then looked at her. Looked at her--everything of her face, her eyes. The look was so desperate, Tara wanted to ask what was the matter. Instead, her vampire pulled her in close and kissed her.

Kissed her like the world would end.

“I’ll be here,” Willow had whispered, eyes wide upon her. Tara left her vampire’s bedroom.

When Tara boarded her hummer, her distracted mind finally allowed her to realize what she hadn’t want to realize, when in the bedroom. Willow fully expected her to run this time.

She would’ve gone back inside the mansion to assure her vampire that wasn’t the case, but her body had her drive away instead.

Tara needed to think.

And after a certain amount of time spent unproductively staring at nothing, with a cooling mocha before her from the Espresso Pump, Tara realized she needed to talk to someone instead.

Anya looked up from her flurry of dusting activity when the Magic Box’s entrance bell jangled merrily.

“Hello! You’re dressed strangely today. Are you preparing for manual labor?” Anya asked cheerfully, noting her friend’s jeans and boots. Such plain dressing was not the norm for Tara’s usually garish taste in clothing.

“Hi Anya,” Tara greeted. She gave her friend a shy smile. “No, I’m dressed more for horse riding.”

“That’s right!” Anya recalled, as she resumed her enthusiastic dusting. “You were planning on doing that every Saturday morning. Or at least hoping to. But you’re here instead. Something has happened,” Anya suddenly concluded, and stopped her dusting. “Something bad. Or else why would you be here with me instead of with the horses?”

“I-I, um, I need a friend to talk to,” Tara said hesitantly, even as she stepped down into the shop.

“Michael’s not coming in to watch the shop until noon,” Anya stated, speaking of the young man she had recently hired to help with the shifts in the Magic Box. Michael was a Sunnydale High student who also dabbled in magic. He was a friend of Amy’s, and though Anya hadn’t much trust of Amy, the ex-demon decided not to hold that against Michael and gave him the sales position Tara had held previously.

“O-oh, I’ll just... I’m sorry,” Tara stammered, and turned around.

“I’ll call him, and get him to come in early,” Anya declared. She walked purposefully for the sales counter, dropped her feather duster behind it, then pulled out the phone. “In the meantime, I can put up an ‘out for break’ sign. Have you been to the new Mexican cafe yet? They make really great huevos rancheros!”

* * *

Anya thoughtfully put another mouthful of delicious mexican sunny side ups in her mouth. It was a very pretty day and she was glad she decided to have the ‘friend talk’ with Tara outside of the store. Anya was mentally patting herself on the back for choosing the option of going out, even though it meant losing lucrative sales. Everything Tara had just told her of her week--of her time with Willow and of what she had learned last night about the vampire--well, it was alot of stuff. Anya was certain she would not have been able to work and listen and then impart her wisdom like a good friend. She could however, eat and listen, and then impart wisdom.

“Okay,” Anya finally said, after she had swallowed some egg yolk, salsa, and pinto beans. “It’s obvious you want to marry her. I mean, who wouldn’t, Willow knows how to keep herself in money and she’s becoming a very respectable demon, very fast, for a vampire. Vampires can be so unpredictable until they mature a bit. But Willow! I saw it right away, she’s got stability. I wouldn’t mind being a second wife to her, after you of course. Besides being perfect mate material, she is rather cute. I may not be very gay, but I believe I can perform to satisfaction for the position,” Anya remarked positively.

Tara only stared at her friend in utter amazement. Anya took that opportunity to liberate Tara’s plate of some mexican omelet. They did eggs so well at this cafe.

“I don’t see why you feel bad about her past. What’s done is done, and even though you are a very good person, Tara, I know you are not as judgmental as certain ‘good’ people are. I never did think you were qualified to be a White Hat,” Anya smiled. “I mean hey, their kind used to torch your kind, once upon a time.

“I’m going to assume,” Anya continued, as she ate the portion of Tara’s omelet she had taken. Her eyes rolled a moment, obviously enjoying the taste. “Mmmfh,” she moaned in appreciation.

“Ass-ss-s--What?” Tara got out, not bothering to make a complete sentence in her pressing curiosity.

“Well, that you still want her, ‘destroyer of other worlds’ qualification included. But you’re also confused as to why you don’t feel as guilty about her crimes as you think you should be.” Now Tara was completely floored, and her face reflected it. “Everyone wants an alpha for a mate,” Anya explained, like it was the most obvious and basic thing in the world. “And what could outweigh silly moral condemnation more than the securement of an alpha like Willow? I mean, you did talk progeny with her, Tara. A vampire of that kind of power can protect your future--your children. Just not everybody else and their children. Which is why I’m finding the position of second wife to Willow very appealing.”

Tara covered her face with her hands in utter self horror. Anya was right! Tara grieved for the worlds her vampire had destroyed, but paradoxically she still wanted Willow--wanted Willow because she was that capable. And not only that--well, Willow was even more than that. Dear Goddess, could her sense of ethics and-and compassion be that much overruled by the natural breeding instinct? She should be fleeing franticly for her life in the other direction, but instead had found the strongest out of the pack and wanted to make babies with it. Add such inescapable gender instincts to the love she was already feeling for a very unique vampire and obviously the blonde witch was a goner. Tara remembered how she ravished Willow in the Hummer when the vampire had talked of babies and groaned.

Anya took that opportunity to grab one of the witch’s fresh melon slices. At this rate, she might get to eat all of Tara’s brunch.

“You’re right,” Tara finally admitted, when she lowered her hands. Anya beamed from where she sat. It wasn’t often that she got to hear that, even though she was often deserving of that particular praise, the ex-demon thought to herself.

“B-but you said ‘wife’,” Tara pressed. “How can you just say that? I thought--”

“Well,” Anya interrupted.

“I’m her Pet,” Tara emphasized. “I’m n-n-not her, h-her--” Tara didn’t know what word she was looking for.

“Her mate,” Anya knowingly supplied. “Vampires never take humans as mates--there’s the whole your dying factor, and also that you’re lower on the food chain. So they call humans Concubines, Companions, Favorites, and such. I told you what it was like for Pets owned by vampires, but I didn’t tell you about how it was before.”

“What do you mean, ‘before’?”

“When you told me the story about the vampire who kept the female lineage of a Favorite for himself? Willow must’ve met him on one of her dimensional hops. It doesn’t happen anymore here, unless very secretly, I would think. The last time I had seen vampires living so closely--and openly--with their chosen humans and their progeny was in the 1300’s. With witches,” Anya said pointedly, and even demonstrated her point by pointing with her fork. “Do you want the rest of your melon?” She then asked.

Tara just pushed her plate to Anya.

“Why did--” Tara queried. And then realization dawned on her. “The Burnings,” she whispered.

“Yes,” Anya nodded, helping herself to Tara’s plate. Over two hundred years of inquisitions and witch persecutions. That had been a very active time for the ex-vengeance demon, who had been frequently called upon by the women tortured, hung, and burned.

“After that, vampires closed ranks. Why? I’m not sure, except that I know that the vampire society that developed since then has been pretty anti-human. Add to that the vampire hunting that flourished and all those fictional novels supposedly exposing their society, I would guess that very few of them would remember that certain humans used to be an acceptable and beneficial part of their Families. And a very loyal part, I might add.” Anya sighed. Ah, the pagan era. Those were the days.

Anya ate the rest of Tara’s melon and briefly ruminated. It used to be vampires, like other demons, knew how to pick very strong humans and enslave them. It made their Families that much more powerful. Today’s vampire just took anything for a Pet and pranced around like a sex toy on a leash actually enhanced their reputation. Anya mentally scoffed at today’s demon youth who could barely boast being over four hundred years old. Their behavior certainly reflected it.

“But Willow remembers...or at least knows,” Tara said slowly.

“Willow is different,” Anya stated.

“The Watchers’ Journals say nothing about this, and they go back before the--”

“They are the reason why vampires are where they are, and you and I are where we are,” Anya interrupted. “As a witch, you have naturally bridged the gap--a very dangerous gap, which I certainly wouldn’t have cared to try myself, but it had been bridged before. And Willow, being that she is a witch as well, has been very willing to meet you there.

“It will work,” Anya continued, smiling. She was just stating what she had already seen in the two well matched mates--because that was what Willow and Tara were, despite Tara being human; to Anya they were already mates. However, at some point, someone will have to tell Willow that. “For the purpose of today’s vampire society, you are a Pet, but between you and Willow?” Anya nodded sagely. “You can go back to the Old way, and it will work.”

Anya then looked at her watch. “Time to go back to the shop!” she announced brightly. Now that she had eaten and given her friend adequate ‘friend time’, she could return to making money. Tara merely nodded, and picked up the bill. She was just about to confess to the ex-demon that she loved Willow. What with the talk of her having supposedly acquired the perfectly qualified--in terms of power, the witch hastily corrected to herself, rather than destruction--‘mate’, where would love fit in?

As Anya rose to go use the restroom, Tara patiently set her concerns about love aside. She would have to seek advice about that, at another time.

Tara made her grateful goodbyes with her friend, and left for the mansion. When she entered the kitchen, she was very happy to realize that she was returning in far more settled spirits than she had left.

“You didn’t go ridin’,” she heard said quietly from the kitchen’s opposing doorway. Willow stood leaning against the frame. The pose was casual, yet unnaturally still. The vampire wasn’t close enough to scent--or not scent--the fact that Tara had not gone to the horse ranch. Then Tara remembered: the phantom Sunnydale map. The mystical tracking device that had a drop of her blood added to the collection of vials in Willow’s desk. God, her vampire was so resourceful.

Tara walked forward, bridging the gap between them. Willow, despite her customary paleness, actually looked wane; lost. And just a little--perhaps just a little defensive.

“Don’t be angry,” the blonde witch whispered as she gently took Willow into her arms. The vampire, thankfully, did not resist. “I’m okay now.”

“Okay?” Willow breathed, her face slightly lined with a frown of confusion. “How?”

“Anya,” Tara merely said, smiling. Willow began to relax. Her witch really was okay. For the first time since waking up this morning, Willow smiled too.

“What did she say?” the vampire asked curiously. She decided that a gift or a favor for Anya would be very appropriate if the ex-demon had fixed what Willow could not.

“Well she just, um.” Tara self consciously pushed some hair behind an ear. “It was more about me...than you. It was just...Your having done, what you did? D-didn’t bother me, as much as it should have. A-and, um, that bothered me.”

Willow didn’t understand. Her witch had grieved very openly over what the vampire had done. Alot. Obviously there was an angle to this that she wasn’t seeing.

“How...didn’t it bother you, Kitten?” Willow slowly asked, utterly perplexed.

“Um.” And now her witch was blushing. “What you did, makes me very sad. And what you can do, is frightening. B-but at the same time...” Kitten’s blue eyes blinked and seemed to stray to every point capable of being seen except directly at her vampire.

“It’s a turn on?” Willow suddenly grinned, realization making her grin grow to almost wicked proportions.

“No!! No, oh god.” And Tara nearly broke their embrace, but Willow held her fast.

“I think I understand Kitten, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have made a funny,” Willow quickly apologized, realizing that whatever Anya had fixed, the vampire had nearly busted to pieces with her joke. “I mean, okay, maybe it’s like this? Maybe,” Willow continued, her voice falling to the soft pitch of the girlish tones she liked to speak when she was with Kitten. “It’s like, how I know you killed the Master? But, you never want to do that again, because it makes you sad. Me, though, I, I very much like knowing that you had done it.

“And,” Willow whispered. “It’s not really about what you did. I just like knowing that you can, Kitten.”

“I’m bad,” her witch wailed softly into Willow’s shoulder.

“No, no baby,” Willow soothed. “Being attracted to power? Even power that can kill you?” Willow wondered if Kitten knew that besides the Slayer, the blonde witch was very capable of dusting Willow if she tried. She doubted, though, that such a fact had yet occurred to her gentle Kitten. “It’s just...natural.”

* * *

Talk of mates with Anya, then trying to make up with Willow...and then everything that had happened yesterday. It was all emotionally draining--draining especially because the idea of being Willow’s beyond just being a Pet was pure fanciful thinking. Tara wondered how an imaginary future with ‘progeny’ and female lines destined to be concubines of vampires had suddenly burdened her own existence. It had all started with that darn Hummer, she mentally accused. It was no wonder then, that Tara decided to ignore her papers and books, indulge in a little baking, and take a well deserved nap. When she awoke, she saw her white silk robe laid on the bed beside her.

See, Tara? Her practical mind admonished. Reality is, you are still a Pet, and you have a role to fulfill. So get it together and go play with Willow!

She hurried to her bath. While in the tub, she meditated a while to help banish unhelpful fantasies of wifedom and babies. When she returned to her bedroom, she was calm and falling easily into her role. She noticed the small jewelry box that lay upon the bosom of the white robe.

When she carefully snapped the tiny gift box open, it revealed a set of simple, yet very beautiful gold rings. Struck by their beauty, Tara gently pried one from its holding. She studied it curiously. It wasn’t a ring, exactly, for one’s finger.

Nor an earring.

Tara paled.

If anything could reinforce to Tara the current nature of her relationship with her vampire, this was it. The blonde witch crossed her arms over her breasts and did the only thing she could do about her forthcoming plight.

She whimpered.

* * *

‘Harm’s World: The Three 3’s’


“The Three 3’s are.” Harm ticked them off her fingers. “Killing. Feeding. Getting Happys. I make sure my boys get all three, it’s the perfect vampire life.”

Harm ground her new Doc Marten boot into the lower fledge’s throat. Okay, he was kinda the boss of the nest she and her kids were massacring, so he got the benefit of receiving ‘Harm talk’. But as compared to Harmony, he was still as low as one could go on the vampire power scale, so talking to him was, the blonde vampire realized, really a waste of time. Especially when he had nothing snappy to contribute to the conversation anyway.

“Get it?” she said, turning to look at the other lower fledge Shawn was holding fast. Geez, he picked another chick vampire to be the witness to this night of mayhem. By the time Harm and her boys got through cleaning this town, the only survivors will be female minions.

Miss brunette nodded eagerly and wisely kept her big, lipsticked mouth shut.

“So then you’ll understand why dumb fuck here, is dust,” Harm ground her boot one last time, to the pleasing crunch of neck bones, and reached down to grab soon to be dusted’s scraggly brown locks. She ripped his head off. There was the familiar rush sound of ‘poof!’, the fall of ash, and Harm was dusting her hands with satisfaction.

“And why you,” she continued, pointing at miss Brunette. “Are going to entertain my boys. Got it?”

Miss Brunette got it all right. She was practically ready to show her talents right there and then when Harm stopped her for a second.

“Wait a minute. Who’s Master of this town?” Harm asked, grabbing the brunette’s chin.

“Willow is--Willow the Wicked is, Harmony,” the fledge squeaked.

“Good girl,” Harm praised, then gave the brunette a smack with her palm on the girl’s cheek. Job done, the blonde vampire strolled away, already dismissing the sounds of her boys whooping and arguing about who’ll get to be first with the female fledge. Harm stepped out of the abandoned church basement and into the cool night air. She pulled out the paper Willow had given her, which listed her hit jobs for the night. She crossed the last name off with satisfaction. This was the third night she had been clearing lairs and nests for Willow. So far so good. She felt the presence of her boy Shawn in the dark.

“Place totally cleaned up?” she asked.

Shawn only nodded. She could always depend on her little warrior to dust any loose ends. “I was,” he then began. “Want to...”

“Yeah. Go. Be back in Master’s cellar before dawn,” Harm just said. Shawn jogged off into the night.

Harm stood silent and still on the weedy church lawn. Sometimes, when she caught herself doing that, she took a moment to be amazed, because being preternaturally still like that? Totally weird. So was not breathing. But that’s how vampires were, and she was trying to give her boys the complete vampire life. So as she listened to her boys make with the Happy in the church basement, Harm mentally checked off number three on the ‘Three 3’s’ list. For tonight, all was good.

* * *

‘Lieutenant Harm: Boo Yah’


Harm stared at Willow’s weirdo glowy, ghost map thingie of Sunnydale.

“These, uh, pink dots, here?” She pointed. Whoops, her finger went right through the ghost map. Fucking weird.

Her boss only nodded, a very graceful, magnanimous nod. A, ‘yeah Harm, I know I’m fucking with you’, elegant type nod. Willow was seated at her icy glass desk with her Pet on her lap. She was fondling Tara’s bare assed tits.

“No problem,” Harm declared. Willow’s mouth was turned up in that usual smirk of hers. Harm felt a tingle in the air, and magic sent a paper on Wills’ desk flying to the blonde vampire’s hands.

“Good hunting,” Willow bade.

Harm ran down the cellar’s stairs like hell hounds were on her heels.

“Move it move it!” she snapped out, as she watched her boys jump to their feet. “We gotta hit three places tonight and they’re on opposite sides of the town! Which one of you knows how to hotwire a car?”

Her boys, in the middle of grabbing their chosen weapons, stared at her blankly. Shit, that’s what she gets for Turning good suburban kids into her minions.

“Bar’,” she called out. She pulled Wills’ paper out and pointed with a finger. “This address? Meet the rest of us there in half an hour, and Bring. Wheels. Something big enough for all of us. Got it? So go, go go go!!”

As Barry’s broad back disappeared through the access to the sewers, Harm grabbed her long handled ax. “All right, move out!”

The first name on her list turned out to be a vampire sex pit in a really nice ‘new homes’ community.

“What the fuck?” Harm said, when Troy came back from his recon of the luxury style home, the house lights all bright like there was a party inside. A Hugh Hefner type vampire swing party--with humans?

“I smelled them--yeah, they’re having a huge orgy in there,” Troy shared, excited.

“Humans mean cash and credit cards. Shawn, make sure all exits are locked up, don’t want anyone escaping. No Body,” Harm looked at each of her boys. “Eats. Any Body, until we put down all vamps. Got it?”

They did the home invasion thing, to the screams of naked, horny humans and vamps alike, and an hour later, Swinger vamp master number one was dusted, Ken was boffing the female vamp they were going to leave as a witness, and Harm was in one of the bedrooms, filling a bag with cash, wallets, and jewelry. She pulled the gold pinky ring off the naked, dead forty year old with the new pec job. Geez, these bleeder whore types--came in all kinds. Barry poked his sandy blonde head in the room.

“BBURRP,” he burped obnoxiously.

“Got the wheels!” he then announced, grinning.

“SHAWN,” Harm bellowed, already moving for the house exit. “What’s the sitch?” She stood a moment, and gave a listen. Not one heartbeat existed in the house. Got her boys well fed tonight, that’s for sure.

“All clean,” Shawn said as he ran down from the upper level.

“Let’s go,” Harm ordered, and threw the loot bag to Troy.

Outside, on the home’s perfectly mowed lawn, Harm could only stare, dumbfounded.

“You got us,” she said after a moment.

“Yeah!” Barry said, grinning.

“A. Fucking.” Harm looked at it again. Nope, it was still there.

“Shit,” Troy said.

“An. Ice Cream. Truck,” Harm pronounced slowly.

“Ice cream man was still in it,” Barry said. He jangled keys. “Got the keys and everything. I swear, it’s cool, boss! No one’ll know it’s us coming!”

Harm rolled her eyes. “Get in!” she barked. “Time’s wasting, we gotta get to the other side of town!”

“Excuse me,” she heard behind her. The female vamp witness was hurrying out of the house, hastily buttoning on a blouse. “Do you think you can give me a ride back into town?”

As Harm sat on one of the storage freezers, Barry in the drivers seat with Ken beside him with the map, she took that moment to look at the situation. It was obviously a test, Wills giving her such distant spots to cover in just one night. Well, okay, ice cream truck? Not the brightest move, but she and her boys had risen to the occasion and were getting the jobs done. But first--as the truck trundled and swayed and sent a box of red vines hitting her head. They got to get to the two last jobs. Then she can consider them done.

She reached into one of the freezers and pulled out a fudge-cicle.

“Could you guys, like, drop me off downtown?” the female vamp asked hopefully. Troy was groping her ass.

Fuck, this was going to be a long night.

* * *

“Harm,” Wills said pleasantly. They were in the kitchen. Wills was packing a red messenger bag with food stuff--which Harm thought was a weird thing to do, since Wills didn’t eat, unless with Tara. Okay, never mind, she got it. Anyway, Wills was packing the red back pack--was, anyway, until she turned to Harm and stared at her all glittery like when she was being full on Master Wills.

“Harm,” Master Wills said again. Great, what did she do? She should’ve waited before sneaking into the kitchen to see if Tara baked anything new. “Why is there an ice cream truck parked in my driveway?”

“Oh, that,” Harm said off handedly. “Those’re my wheels, Wills.”

Wills just looked at her.

“Ice cream truck,” Harmony tried again. “Totally inconspicuous. Wouldn’t see us coming. And it fits all of us. And.” Beat. “It’s got ice cream.”

“And candy,” Wills added in that sweet, little girl voice of hers. Her large eyes still stared at Harm, still glittering. “Is there anything chocolate? Mum likes chocolate.”

“Soon as it’s dusk, we’ll grab everything chocolate for you, Wills,” Harm assured with gung ho attitude.

“Make sure you change the license plates, Harm,” Willow then said softly. “And the registration on the dash. Don’t want the police snooping.”

“Absolutely, Wills,” Harm agreed enthusiastically. “Will do, Wills.”

And her boss finally turned away, resuming her packing. Harm made her escape for the cellar, hoping to catch some shut eye and to make sure she was up before dusk. She wouldn’t know of course, that when her boss finally returned with her Pet from UC Sunnydale that afternoon, she would turn to Tara and say, “Kitten, have you ever seen the inside of an ice cream truck?”

Which is why, when dusk arrived, and Harm was exiting the mansion’s kitchen, she saw her four boys with their weapons, huddled like peeping toms in the bushes.

“What the fuck?” she said sharply. “Why aren’t you guys in the truck?!”

“Uh,” Barry just whispered, and pointed. The white ice cream truck was doing the creaking dance of boffing.

“Fuck!” Harm exclaimed. “Who’s in there?”

“Master...and Mistress,” Ken whispered, almost reverently. His blue eyes were as big as saucers. “For. For the last forty five minutes.”

Harmony finally heard the truck cease its luv rock motion. Two somebodys stepped down from its back, and headed for the kitchen door. Wills had her arm around Tara, who was discreetly straightening out her top. They disappeared inside.

Harm never saw her boys move so fast in her short unlife, as they ran scrambling for the truck, shoving each other as they went.

“Shawn!” she shouted. “I don’t want to see you licking anything in there!!”

* * *

‘Harm: Momster’


Harm ran out of the three story Victorian.

She didn’t quite make it to the sidewalk. She collapsed to her knees and threw up her stomach’s bloody contents on the patchy lawn.

“Shit,” she finally said weakly, getting up. She didn’t know that as a vampire, she still had stomach juices. Now her fucking nose burned.

She felt Barry standing behind her.

“Mom?” he asked softly. Barry knew better than to call her that when they were on the job.

“Get Shawn to--do the ones in the cribs! Every single, fucking one gets dusted in there!” She could hear the high pitched screams of small children within the Victorian. “NO. Witnesses. Dust the bitch, don’t even suck her down.”

Barry nodded, his face stony. He ran back into the old house. Harm just stood, still and silent, on the lawn, until she could hear nothing--not even a rustle, from the old house. She felt Shawn approach her from behind, then all her boys.

“All done,” he simply said.

“Good,” Harm acknowledged. Willow had thought that this was going to be a big job for Harm. To Wills’ magic, the address had revealed a hell of alot of ‘pires inside. The redhead had even provided the blonde vampire with nifty satellite photo close ups, so she could best scope the house out and plan her attack. Who would’ve guessed they would finish so early tonight? The easiest job they ever dusted, yet one Harm wished she never, ever had to do.

“Boys,” Harm finally announced. “Rest of the night is ours. What do you want to do?”

Four young men grunted on the courtyard. While her boys played two on two b-ball, Keds and Adidas skidding on the court, Harm prowled within the asphalt’s chain fenced perimeter. The Three 3’s. Kill. Feed. Get Happys. Sometimes giving the boys their Happy didn’t necessarily mean sex. Sometimes it was as simple as that promised Playstation 2 she was going to get them, or pizza night out, or like right now, basketball. Harm liked to think of herself as a good mom. Especially tonight. Harm needed--really needed, to be a good mom tonight.

So she prowled the fenced perimeter, her enhanced senses as a fledging Childe reaching out into the darkness. It would be only a matter of time; the court was fully lit, and she herself, her own vamp power signature, was right here.

Harm didn’t sense her--the Slayer kept out of range--but she heard the cross bow click. She leapt right into the flying bolt, taking it in the shoulder--didn’t want it whizzing past her and hitting any of her boys. Fuck, the new Slayer knew how to shoot through a chain link fence!

“MOM!” she heard shouted behind her. She saw the K-Slayer running for the court, crossbow in hand.

“GO GO GO!!” Harm shouted, waving behind her. “I’ll take care of it!” She was glad her boys were following her order on this one. She could hear them scramble up the chain linked fence behind her just as the K-Slayer slammed the fence door shut, locking Harm in the b-court. K-Slayer, all business, raised her crossbow and took aim.

“Isn’t this like shooting fish in a barrel? I thought you Slayer types liked a challenge,” Harm sharply complained to the stoic girl. She reached quickly into her black jeans’ pocket. Thankfully, she had enough preternatural accuracy to toss the object through the chain linked fence and at the Slayer’s feet.

“By the way,” Harm added, as the tiny object flashed, blinding the Slayer. “A little gift from Willow.”

Harm turned to make her graceful exit. Her left arm was useless with the crossbow bolt still in her. Shawn was at the foot of the fence, on her side.

“Fuck! I told you idiots to run!” Harm bit out. Shawn gave her a boost up to where her other three boys were still straddling the fence. Troy dropped down to receive her on the other side.

“Yeah, we did,” Barry grinned at her as he helped her over. “But not without you, Mom.”

* * *

“Harm,” Wills acknowledged, as she looked up from the huge, mahogany desk she sat behind. It was just before noon, and Harmony knew she would catch the boss in her study before she went out and met Tara for coffee. When Wills was in her Sanctum, she conducted Master of Sunnydale business, but out here, in the study adjoining her library, she was Wills, head of House. Willster laid aside the papers she was looking at.

“You’ve been hurt,” the redhead said matter of factly. The bolt job hadn’t healed up entirely yet, so Harm was forced to wear a temporary sling. “Was last night’s lair a difficult hit?”

“Naw,” Harm dismissed. “K-Slayer did this. I gave her that prezzie you wanted me to use whenever I ran into her. Me and the boys got out of the sitch fine.”

“Good,” Willow said softly, and returned her attention to her carefully laid out papers. From where Harm stood, the papers looked kind of like letters of recommendation, or...resumes. Weird.

“Are we going to take on the Slayer, any time later?” Harm asked curiously. She was wondering, seriously, if she and her boys were up to that. If Willow ordered the hit, she’ll have to do it, and of course, her boys, being the dumb minions they were, would think that would be so cool. They were too young to have seen yet how a Slayer fought. Harm had seen Buffy do her thing. Slayers were not to be fucked with lightly.

Willow raised her green eyes again. “That is a situation you should clarify to your boys,” the redhead said thoughtfully. “I don’t want the Slayers, either of them, confronted. See them coming, run the other way. The idea is not to look like cowards,” Wills then said with a slight smirk. “But to be prey so irritatingly out of reach, you’ll always be frustrating them. Get me?”

Harm thought a moment. “Cooool,” she exhaled. “Like taunting. I get you, Wills.”

Wills just graced her with a small smile.

“My boys might get hot headed,” Harm admitted. “See Slayer, wanna rip. They’re going to want to know why the hands off. Not that you have to tell me, boss,” Harm added hastily.

“It’s a legitimate question,” Willow allowed, eyes actually sparkling. Thankfully, Willster was in a good mood this morning. “For every generation, there is a Slayer. When one falls, another takes her place. I think the current Slayer is,” Willow made a little gesture with a hand. “Manageable. So we are going to keep her alive, and not allow anyone new be Called.”

Harm nodded slowly. Wow, Wills was like, a really, really smart Master.

Willow gave her a last smile then returned to perusing the stuff on her desk. Harm stayed where she was. It was now or never, Harmster, she thought to herself. You want this, so go for it.

“Wills,” she said hesitantly. She waited until Willow glanced up again. “I gotta...I have to talk to you about that job last night.”

Harm was feeling a little awful. Thinking about last night’s job made her feel like that. She really needed Wills’ advice, and maybe that need had shown up on her face, because the redhead stood up from her leather chair behind the desk. Willow then moved around the desk for the leather guest chair facing it.

“Harm, here,” Willow ordered, and gave a small pat to her thigh. Harm knew what that meant. As Willow sat down in the guest chair, the blonde vampire took a quick seat at her feet. Kind of awkward with the one arm, but she got there. Willow then leaned forward, slim arms resting on her knees, and clasped her hands together.

“Tell me what happened,” the redhead requested gently.

Harm took an unneeded breath. “It was like you said,” she began. “Lots of vamp presence in the house. With real weak signatures, but they were all there, and that was because,” and Harm felt like spitting. “The bitch of the house Turned children,” she stated sharply.

Willow gazed with receptive calm. She said nothing.

“Really little children, Wills,” Harm clarified. She remembered tripping over toys, kicking at the tiny toddler freaks that tried to bite her. “And okay, that was majorly freaky, and I could almost see them as insane little vampire midgets, but then, then there was the room with the--” Baby room. Fucking big baby room. With mobiles, and blankies, and pastel murals on the walls, of castles and fluffy sheep and clouds. “With the...I had Shawn take care of it. I know he would of done them all. I think I counted six cribs.” But you don’t know how many vampire babies were in each crib, Harm, she thought to herself. She never bothered to ask Shawn.

“Is there something wrong with me?” Harm then asked shakily. She couldn’t look at Wills anymore. “I mean, demon here, yeah? So how come I can’t deal with, with some psycho vamp bitch who goes and Turns babies?”

“You can’t,” she heard Willow say softly. “Because it’s sick.”

Harm closed her eyes for a moment, the gratitude she felt for her Master’s words washing over her. If Willow could understand this, then it was okay. Her reaction to the freaky vamp babies was okay.

“We are cruel things,” Willow continued, and when Harm looked up, her Master’s green eyes held that familiar cold glitter. “And some of us are content with a certain level of cruelty. But even we can have among us, some remarkable sickos--vampires who have carried over the twisted qualities of their human selves. Turning babies and toddlers means trapping the demon within a defenseless, helpless vessel. It is a cruelty to our own Brethren of the highest kind. It is misuse of our Gift. You did the demon world a service,” Willow then added quietly. “You did very well last night, Harm.”

And Harmony, if she could, just wanted to say ‘Fuck me’, because her Master’s words actually closed her own throat up.

“Thanks Wills,” Harm finally said, when she could manage to speak. “Thanks.”

* * *

‘Harm: The Right Hand, Or The Left Hand? Of The Wicked’


After the vamp baby talk, Wills gave Harm a cell phone. Then, later that evening, she got summoned into the Sanctum to talk about Felix. Felix, yuck. Harm always wanted to make an ewwy face when even thinking of the guy. Either that or put a boot in his sucky puss. He kissed ass like no other. Yeah, even better than Harmony Kendall, one time number one sheep of Cordelia Chase. But Harm knew that the Felix situation Wills had dropped into her lap was yet another test. Another of those, ‘Fuck up, or no?’ tests. So what to do? Harm gave it a run with her brain cells.

“Okay,” Harm said to herself, as she and the boys waited in the ice cream truck, a few blocks from Felix’s lair. “On the one hand, Willow doesn’t give sanctuary, so she gives that power to me, because maybe Felix is worth his sorry ass.” Harm took a bite out of the red vine in the one hand. “But then on the other hand, I hate his ass, so now I’ve got the perfect opportunity to grind it into dust and laugh.” She took a thoughtful bite from the red vine in her other hand.

“Okay, this is not working,” she declared, looking at the still perfectly equal length red vines in her hands. “Obviously this is like, all about Harm being wise, versus Harm being a demon. Now, Wills is wise, so, she’ll want Harm to be wise. So.” she folded her arms. “Harm,” she told herself firmly. “Don’t be a demon.”

Shit. Which still didn’t prevent her from kicking the shit out of Felix, half an hour later after Wills’ phone call, but thankfully, she managed to remind herself in time that she had decided already to spare that shit’s sorry ass.

“This is frustrating,” Harm admitted to herself as Barry pointed the ice cream truck home to the mansion. And Harm knew exactly why she was frustrated. She didn’t get to fulfill one of her own personal Three 3’s. Kill something. Especially something with Felix’s dumb ass face. So she decided to overcompensate with point Three: getting her Happy.

And with Shawn always wanting to run off every chance he could get to see his secret pussy--who Harm easily suspected, was little Miss Waify with the Big Eyes like Willow’s--that left Harm with Barry, Ken, and Troy to fuck senseless.

“So...when are you getting us that Playstation?” Barry asked finally, from where he lay on one of her boobs. Harm just smacked him on the head. Troy slipped off her other boob, already dead asleep.

“Master’s cellar’s not exactly equipped for stuff like that,” Harm replied. “As soon as we finish cleaning up the town, I’ll find us a place.” Actually, she was hoping Willow would help find that place. Getting access to utilities would require an identity--she kinda doubted her own boys knew how to steal things like gas and electricity. Harmony was also aware that she was officially dead--she did claw her way out of her own grave, for christ sakes. The thing was, she wasn’t sure how to get her identity back in order to do stuff like get a house running. And bank accounts. She’d really like to have a bank account again.

Harm turned her head to where the stacks of cash and loot lay, neatly laid out on the table usually meant for Wills’ torture instruments. Willow had said that anything she turned over from the jobs was all hers, which was pretty damn magnanimous. Especially when Troy thoughtfully pointed out that maybe that also included the lairs they’d hit too. Like the sex pit house. Or the cars that belonged to those swinging humans, as Ken belatedly pointed out. Duh, idiot. Too bad he didn’t suggest that when they drove off in the ice cream truck.

But the sex pit house was out of the question, too high profile. And the Victorian? Harm would rather be dusted first than set foot in that psycho place again.

The money, Harm mused, as Barry snored into her chest, was another Willster test. First, she had to show she could deal with a difficult situation. Then, she gets handed a minion’s fate, so she had to show that she could, uhhh, think. Yeah, think about the situation, and not just kill. And now? Money.

Because money, and all the above? That’s what Masters think about. That’s what they took care of, losing sleep while their minions did the Three 3’s and slept happily drooling on a Sire’s boobs. And why the fuck was Barry snoring anyway? It’s not like the dummy needed to breathe.

Harm had wanted to start her own little House when she had fled to the sewers, just those few weeks ago, but Wills was showing her what it really was like to take care of a Family. Wills wasn’t even Sire, but she was giving Harm the lessons, in her own really subtle way. Harm could worry about that. Harm could maybe bitch. But in the end, she was kinda grateful. Wills was a good Master. Harm could only try to be a good Hand.

* * *

‘Harm: Single Momster’


“Shawn,” Harm said quietly. “You know what you’re asking?”

Her boy Shawn, with his dark brown eyes and even darker hair, was kneeling before her in the cellar. His girlie, little miss Waify, was beside him. Totally a stick of a chick, miss Waify. Big blue eyes and dark, almost black hair. Long graceful arms and legs like a ballerina. She did look like Wills in body, especially with those big eyes, but this girl’s face was more like, uh, Holly Golightly. Yeah. Breakfast at Tiffany’s. But that’s if Holly had looked fourteen and orphaned.

“But Master said,” Shawn was saying slowly. He was giving Harm his version of Puppy eyes--which from Shawn, was hardly Puppy eyes. Make them honest type, no nonsense, I’m being sincere and totally trusting here, eyes. “You have the power of Sanctuary.”

“Yeah, I do,” Harm said. “In public. But Master still has final say on who’s accepted into my Family because she’s gotta take care of me and mine. And Waify here, I need a really good reason to bring her in beside her being your boff buddy.”

Shawn was a boy of few words. Really few. So all he could do was sit and look a little needy. And confused. Little Miss Waify’s big eyes drifted to the concrete floor. She obviously didn’t know what to say for herself.

“She can be all our boff buddies,” Barry suggested somewhere behind Harm.

“Still not a good reason, Bar’,” Harm called out, but she sensed all her boys’ sexual excitement at the suggestion. Well, if Waify could handle Shawn, her little Mister Atlas, then she could probably handle the rest of them.

“Okay, I’ve thought of something,” Harm declared, more to herself than to the rest of the cellar. “C’mere.” She gestured to the slim thing. “We’re gonna talk.” They went to sit on the cellar steps. Harm did, anyway. She had Waif-girl sit at her feet.

“Go to sleep!” she barked at her curious boys. “It’s day, and we got more shit to do tonight!”

Harm looked at the girl and did a mental sigh.

“What’s your name?”

“Elise,” came the soft answer.

“That’s pretty,” Harm commented. “How old were you?”

“I was going to be seventeen.”

“Uh huh. How long ago were you Turned?”

The girl thought a moment. “A week b-before you showed up at Master Steve’s.”

“That barely makes you two weeks old. Steve was your Sire?” Nod. “He teach you to hunt?” Shy shake of the head.

“But Shawn is showing me,” the girl volunteered in that soft voice of hers.

“So you can hunt now?”

“Yes...yes I can,” the girl said with more confidence.

“Gimme your wrist,” Harm requested. She went to demon face, ran a fang along Elise’s slim wrist. She licked her blood up for a taste. The blonde vampire analyzed it on her tongue awhile, still holding the girl’s wrist.

“Yeah,” Harm mused. “Like I thought. Elise,” she said. “You’re a weak demon.”

“W-What?” the girl whispered in disbelief. “What does that mean?”

“You were Made to be the weakest kind of minion. You’ve got the strengths of a vampire though. See? Already healing,” Harm indicated, showing the girl her own wrist. She then dropped it, focusing on the girl. “And I bet you hold your own really well doing the wild rodeo with Shawn. But you were Turned to be that kind of fuck toy. Weak demon, so that you can still feel stuff and suffer when you get played with; vampire qualities so that you can heal up fast and get fucked with again.”

Elise had turned away, so Harm had to lean a little to catch the girl’s face.

“See? You’re crying now, hon’. Strong demons don’t do that. Just a little ghost of what you remember of being human has been left in you. I bet you’ve even walked out into the daylight a couple of times by accident, right?”

“I, I forgot,” Elise admitted shamefully.

“And that’s why your Sire didn’t bother to teach you to hunt. You weren’t meant to last. But you want to keep on unliving, don’t you Elise? No more accidentally walking into the sun or letting Shawn do your kills for you?”

Harm could hear her boy stir at the other end of the cellar. Duh, like she couldn’t guess.

“Yes, yes Harmony, I want to live,” Elise said bravely, eyes wide. Those big blues were still wet but they had conviction now. Conviction was good.

“Then I endorse you, Elise,” Harm said. “But if Master says you gotta go, you go. And Shawn can’t see you anymore.”

Emotion rare for a demon prevented Elise from saying anything, but she understood, and bravely nodded.

“Good,” Harm said.

* * *

Master Wills was in the kitchen again, and she was making sandwiches. Prissy, tea time sandwiches, with the cut crusts and everything. Harm appreciated them aesthetically, but she wished she could still appreciate them taste wise, too. Since being undead, all she could eat of human type food was chocolate.

And Master Wills was humming. That was good. That was like, really really good.

“Hey Wills,” Harm greeted casually, as her boss carefully scored, then folded wax paper over a finished sandwich.

“Harm,” Wills said pleasantly.

“I have a new minion below,” Harm said slowly. “She’s a really young thing, and she’s seeking sanctuary with me and mine.”

“Harm, hot water to warm up these two thermos bottles,” Wills indicated with her butter knife. “I want blood in one, and the tea from this pot in the other.”

Harm did as she was asked, as Wills made another sandwich. The redhead even used a ruler.

“I figured, her being newly Made only two weeks ago?” Harm continued. “Easier to mold, y’know? And she’s teenish, and totally unthreatening looking. I’ve got big boys, and it would be nice to have a minion who can do the whole blend in the crowd thing...or even be bait,” Harm then added. The thought of little Elise as a lure worked itself out in the blonde vampire’s head. Yeah, that could work. She screwed the two thermos bottles shut, then set them beside her boss’ picnic basket.

“But,” Willow added pleasantly as she folded wax paper over another finished sandwich.

“Okay,” Harm sighed. “But, she’s one of those really weak minions. The ones meant to be toys.”

Finally, Willow looked at her. Not expressionless, because Wills never closed her face off entirely when looking at people. It was more her ‘Master’s Gentle Poker Face’, the one where she was probably thinking all sorts of scary things but decided she’ll not frighten the person she was looking at with what she was thinking.

“I’ll look at your little girl,” Wills finally answered, her eyes unfathomable.

Harm led quickly down to the cellar, boots thundering.

“Master on the deck!” she bellowed sharply into the cellar. When she hit the floor, Wills right behind her, the red haired vampire headed immediately for the chair--the Master’s chair--set up on a platform at one end of the cellar. Wills threw her skinny self into it, a leather clad leg draped casually over an armrest, and folded her slender hands over her stomach. Her cold, green eyes looked at nothing in particular in the room.

“Show me,” she said in a bored voice.

“Elise,” Harm called sharply, and gestured, as discretely as possible, to the foot of Wills’ chair. She was risking it with the coaching, but she didn’t want the little chick messing up. Elise was quick, and very, very quiet, Harm had to admire. The little minion was at Willow’s feet almost immediately, kneeling, and kept her eyes demurely down.

Looking at the two of them, Master and minion, Harm wondered to herself why she even compared the two; Wills was all power, deadly and scary. Elise was all vulnerability, fragile and innocent looking. But then Harm remembered; Willow, when she was human? Elise was something like that.

“Look up,” she heard Willow request quietly.

Harm sort of held breath she didn’t have, as she watched two pairs of big eyes stare into the other. Wills was not impressed, she could tell. But despite that, the Wicked continued to look into those big blue eyes.

“You are accepted,” Willow announced abruptly. She uncoiled her slim body off the chair and made her quick way to the stairs. Elise just sat on the floor and stared in shock.

As Harm heard the cellar door shut, she marveled to herself: Wow, I just gained a girl kid.

* * *

‘Harm: THE Hand Of The Wicked, Loser!’


The day Harm got a girl kid was also the night she inherited a building, thanks to her dusting some skank named Arnie. Whether she wanted the dive hole bar and its tenement building or not, she got the crappy place, because the ownership papers for it was actually in the safe in dusted Arnie’s office.

Wills did specifically say on the phone, quote: ‘Take everything’. She wouldn’t have said that unless she really, really meant for Harm to have everything of the skank’s.

“Shit!” Harm exclaimed, when Elise helpfully emptied the safe and laid the paperwork out for her on the desk. That and a couple of stacks of yummy grand in large bills. The dust formerly known as Arn had come rushing back to his bar with his goon, obviously aware his unlife days were numbered. Harm had debated whether to let him enter his building and believe he would be able to escape the Wicked--thereby catching him with his safe emptied and loot in hand, OR, whether it would be more fun to just nail the dumb fuck and torture him for his bank books and safe combo instead. All her boys voted for torturing.

So that night, after some bone breaking and flesh burning and some minor stomping of the safe combination out of Arnie, Harm sat in the skank’s cheap leather chair and stared at the papers that meant she could own this bung hole excuse for a ratty, leaky building.

Crap.

Willow, the next morning, wasn’t very helpful, when Harm poked her wary self into the library. The boss was busy flipping through a book--something with a weirdo title like ‘Transmorgofish’ whatsis. When Wills finally acknowledged the blonde vampire’s presence, all she said was a simple, smirky ‘Congratulations’. Then she went back to reading. Harm got the hint. As the blonde vampire made her glum way back downstairs, she could not fathom for the unlife of her why Wills saddled her with a rundown building and bar on sleazy Third and Wilkins. Why?? Harm’s head hurt.

“Shit,” Harm said, with her head in her hands as she sat in the cellar.

“Maybe you should just sleep on it, Mom,” Ken suggested. Yeah right, with Elise making little cute moaning sounds over there, being the smooshed Elise patty in a Bar’ plus Shawn manwich? Harm had to admit, Elise sounded sweet when she was getting fucked, but now was not the time for Horny Harm. They so needed a house, and no, it was not going to be the skank dive bar or the psycho Victorian.

“Yeah, sleep,” Troy also suggested, his mouth all kissable and his Dockers doing the Trojan pup tent.

Harm thought about unlife when it had simply been the Three 3’s.

“Okay, yeah, fine,” Harm just said, and grabbed Ken by his Ken stick.

* * *

After the sleep Ken and Troy had lewdly suggested, Harm got her orders from Wills for her last night of official town cleaning. For some reason, she hadn’t felt one hundred percent up to it. Sorta like that infamous off day she had in cheerleading when she was tired and accidentally fucked up one of Cordy’s routines. It should have been no surprise then, that the last job ended up a bitch. Her boys had been top minion all week, so they were overconfident. When they got to the last nest, the vamps were actually ready for Harm and Co. She should’ve anticipated that.

“Idiot!” Harm snapped, as she narrowly ducked a length of pipe from dumb vamp number one. She shoved the lower fledge’s big head into the plaster wall, pulled it out, then axe chopped him behind the knees. Harm didn’t have to say ‘timber’.

“Why the fuck are you fighting?” she had to ask. This nest was crazed--the targeted vamps were fighting back like it was the Alamo. “If you wanted to survive, you could’ve gone to the Wicked and asked.”

“The Wicked doesn’t give Sanctuary,” the lead minion spat back.

“Well I do, you dumb ass, cuz I’m THE Hand of the Wicked. But since you decided to ruin my night by not leaving town like smart idiots, you get shit from me. So long, fucker!”

And Harm axed his sorry ass to dust.

By the time they loaded up into the ice cream truck and headed home, her little Family had some sorry wounds to share between them. Troy had the worst of it, having been knifed in the gut, so he was chugging down the emergency blood supply. Ken looked like he had some busted ribs, but he wasn’t saying. Little Elise had a broken arm. Bar’ and Shawn looked fucked over.

“You guys did good,” Harm managed to say, with as much praise in her voice as she could muster.

“So...Playstation?” she heard Barry ask from the driver’s seat. Harm couldn’t really see him because her left eye had swollen shut. She laughed.

“Yeah baby,” she chuckled. “We’ll go to Toys R Us.”

She couldn’t believe the smiles she got, from just saying that.

When they pulled up at the mansion’s driveway, they had to back out again. Barry just said that their spot was taken and parked their truck down the street. Because it was nearing dawn, Harm hustled the kids into the kitchen quick. Then she looked at the shiny new vehicle sitting in the boss’ driveway. She stared at it for a long while.

When dawn’s light started to prickle her, Harm went to stand behind the safety of the kitchen door and peeked through the curtained window. Finally, a beam of light seared her hand. She gave up looking at the new car, and then felt the night’s weariness hit her. She left the kitchen and made her slow way to the cellar. Tara was coming down the stairs.

“Oh, hey,” the Pet said. She looked at Harm with some concern. “A-Are you all right?”

“Oh. Yeah, tough night,” Harm excused. She actually managed a smile, although the left side of her face appeared to be busted. “Is the H2 yours?”

Tara grinned shyly. “W-Willow gave it to me.”

“Sweet. It makes me think the H1 would be perfect for my boys.”

“Oh, definitely.”

“Are you baking this morning?”

“N-No, actually, I have to go to the hospital. But I plan to, tomorrow. Cookies.”

“That’ll be cool.” Harm yawned, and it hurt. She turned for the cellar door. “See ya.”

“Good night, Harmony.”

* * *

‘Willow-Dad’


When Harmony stepped quietly into the living area, it was Saturday night, and the first night where she didn’t have to leave the mansion and go dust some unlivings. It felt good to stay in. Moms needed their night of rest too. Troy was healing nicely in the cellar, and the other kids had felt fine enough to go out hunting for fresh blood. They knew to avoid the Slayer, so Harmony decided not to worry.

The mood in the house felt easy and content; sated, which might be a mood due to the Pet Willow held in her arms as she and her human lounged on the couch by the blazing fire. Harm stood at a distance, not daring to intrude. She was pretending that she was heading for the kitchen, where she knew Tara had left out freshly baked cookies. Harm could always get them later for the kids. Right now, she was just going to pretend she was headed that way, when instead she was enjoying the lazy scent of sex and blood from Wills and her Pet. Willow craned her neck slightly in Harm’s direction, honoring the blonde vampire with a glance.

“Come sit with me, Harm,” Wills invited.

Harmony moved across the living area and sank into the armchair opposite where Willow lay upon the couch. The redhead was reclined against throw pillows. Tara was draped over her, back to Willow’s front, her head at her Master’s chest. Willow was fully dressed, but Tara was in her deep blue robe. Harm could scent the sleepy woman’s heady musk, and Harmony, since she wasn’t feeling horny, could just enjoy how the sexy scent left her feeling contented instead. Willow smiled her secret little smile, and ran her fingers gently along the bare skin between the folds of Tara’s robe.

“Thanks Wills,” Harm said, referring to the invitation to sit. It was a very important invitation. It meant the blonde vampire was finally worthy of the honor of relaxing in the presence of her boss. Willow just continued to softly smile and caress Tara. Her hand strayed within the robe and Tara shrank away slightly, seemingly discomforted by the touch. Harm idly wondered why. Then Willow glanced up at Harm, mischievous. She carefully pulled Tara’s robe back, exposing a soft breast. Gold glinted at the nipple.

“Wow,” Harm exclaimed. “That’s new.” She cocked her head critically. The nipple and aureole was large and swollen from having been pierced, but with the gold ring through it, it definitely looked sexy.

“I just did it tonight,” Willow said softly, smirking as her fingers traced around the sensitive, tender area. She parted the robe further to reveal the mate. Twin spots of gold glinted against pale, soft globes of flesh. Very nice.

“Can we get pierced too?” Harm asked. She was thinking of Troy in nipple rings. And Ken. And Bar’. Heck, all of them. Herself included.

“I mean,” Harm tried to clarify. “I haven’t tried it. And I know we just heal up when we get poked.”

“Oh you can have them done. You just have to keep re-piercing whenever you remove the jewelry.” Willow glanced up at Harm again, green eyes twinkling. “I wouldn’t suggest wearing any dangling shiny bits while in a fight though. Can tear off something permanently, that way.”

“Gotcha,” Harmony nodded.

“But once you learn how, it’s quite easy,” Willow continued softly, running her fingers gently over her Pet. “A pair of nipple clamps, a nice, sharp, sterile needle....” One of Willow’s fingers, with feathery grace, traced a gold ring, and Tara inhaled sharply through her nose.

“For humans, it takes a few weeks to heal,” Wills smirked at Harm. “But I’ve put a healing spell on Kitten. In about two days she’ll be ready to play.” The redhead wrinkled her nose deviously at Harmony, and the blonde vampire found herself smiling.

“Oh shit, healing spell,” Harm suddenly ejected, more to herself, as she clapped a hand to her forehead. Willow’s face fell to seriousness and looked at her curiously.

“I just. I’m an idiot. I forgot that you do all sorts of magic, Wills,” Harm explained. “The Order wasn’t big with endorsing the mojo, so I’m kinda not used to thinking that way. Some of the kids got fucked up last night. Troy got knifed, Ken had busted ribs, and Elise broke an arm. I got them a huge amount of bagged from Willie’s, so everyone’s okay now except for Troy. He’s still mending.”

“I’ll take a look at him,” Wills offered, frowning slightly.

“Thanks Wills, totally appreciate it.”

“You know Kitten’s a witch too, right?” the redhead then said, smiling again.

Harm hit her forehead again. “Duh! So that’s what a witch feels like! I thought you put a major mojo signature on her or something!”

“You’ve got a lot to learn, Harm,” Willow noted. “You are only a few months old. But you do know a lot about being a vampire, and that’s good. How about other demons? Do you know who’s who?”

Harm shook her head. “Not too good with that Wills. You know how retarded the Order was.”

“On the Hellmouth, you need to know. I’m going to give you some demonology books to go over, and you teach them to your kids too. Vampires aren’t everything, Harm, and you should learn who of the demons can be an asset, and who can be your enemy.”

Harm nodded solemnly. Good to know.

“Now,” Willow then said, as she settled back upon her cushions. She didn’t bother to cover her Pet up again, but wrapped her arms around Tara’s shoulders. “Is there anything you want to talk about?”

Wow. Like what a great opening from Wills, Harmony thought. Okay, Harm, this is your chance, go go go for it!

“Well,” the blonde vampire said slowly. “I want a new home for me and mine. Not that I appreciate your cellar, Wills, but the kids should have their own rooms. And a space to train in.” Harm thought briefly of little Elise, who just had her first fight the other night. “And I really would like my own kitchen.”

Harm wasn’t sure, but she thought the dozing Pet, who had shut her sleepy eyes a while ago, actually quirked a fleeting smile.

“You didn’t like any of the lairs you cleaned out?” Wills murmured curiously from where she lay.

“That skank bar and building on Third? El Yucko. The psycho Victorian can collapse into the Hellmouth for all I care. And the sex pit house in that new ‘Happyville’ community? I don’t want home owner fees, Will. Can you see me maintaining a lawn to gestapo neighborhood standards?”

Willow fell silent, obviously thinking. Or maybe half sleeping, Harm couldn’t tell. Finally her boss spoke.

“I’ll find you a place, Harm. It will need to be big, because I want you to add to your Family. We’ll talk about that later,” And Harmony nodded her understanding. If Wills says she’ll take care of it, then she will. Harm didn’t have to worry anymore.

“Thanks Wills,” Harm said gratefully. She took an unneeded breath. “Another thing...I’ve got a load of cash downstairs. I want to open bank accounts, and other legal stuff. But I’m going to need--”

“Your identity back?” Willow interrupted with a small smile.

“Yeah, a headstone in Sunnydale Restful says I’m dead. Do you think you can set me up?”

“I most certainly can,” Wills confirmed.

“Great. Thanks. And another thing.”

This time Willow raised an eyebrow. She was still in a good mood, Harm could tell, so she pushed onward.

“The bar on Third? I don’t know why you gave it to me, Will.”

“You don’t want it, Harm?”

“It’s a dump. And hello, legally, I’m still seventeen. I can’t own a bar.”

“Property is property, Harm. It has value, even if you don’t want to keep the bar running. A very profitable bar, if you bothered to look at Arnie’s books, Harm.”

“I was too busy counting the actual profits to look. It’s a skank bleeder’s bar, Wills. I don’t want it.”

Willow cocked her head slightly on the cushions, as she looked at Harm.

“Are you sure, Harmony?” Willow asked quietly.

Harm thought. Well, she tried to think. The problem was, she knew Willow gave her the bar as a test, but she still didn’t know why--or what for. So she didn’t know what to think about. And maybe her blondeness was finally getting to her, because all Harm could think was: how the heck was some skank property going to help her give her kids the Three 3’s?

“Yeah Wills,” Harm finally said. “I can’t bother with it, even with trying to sell it and shit. It’s not what’s important. Please take it, Will.”

Willow slowly smiled, and this time it wasn’t just secret like, but entirely pleased. And Harm thought: Did I pass? Because, even though she hadn’t a flying fuck of a clue as to what she’d passed, she guessed she did, and a sense of deep relief washed over her.

“I’ll take care of it, Harm,” Willow finally promised.

“Good. You’re the Dad, so you should.”

Willow’s green eyes widened, and she laughed then. Not so much out loud, but her chest shook. Tara opened her blue eyes, and she was laughing silently too, giving Harmony a big, fond smile.

Shit yes, Willow was the dad of this vampire Family, Harm concluded to herself. Just as Harmony was the mom who took care of the kids, and Tara was the mom Willow happily fucked. This was how things were in Willow’s House.

So Harmony, sitting cozy by the fire with her Master and her Pet, decided that tonight, unlife was very good indeed.

* * *

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